Let's just eliminate all the bullshit, shall we?







Thursday, October 7, 2010

"What the What?!?!" with all this week's KRAZY

Sometimes it helps to know that what you see and
feel are not unique; to know that what you are going
through is widespread. To realize that everyone on the
planet suffers, struggles,  and knows what heartbreak is
can make the process of coping easier since you understand
you aren't being singled out.

But enough already--ENOUGH!

The last week or so following the full moon has been
Nut City! Every person I know is having a string of extra
difficulties. Tensions are high at work and home. People are
flipping out, getting aggressive, paranoid, etc left and right.
So, wiggy as it is, at least we know it's not in our heads, right?

Thank goodness for small favors! The insanity is not isolated!
Recognize it for what it is; a passing phase. A torment. Not
something that has to be followed or joined in with. Be the bigger
person....walk away. Smile. Defuse the situation. Avoid drama
where possible. Give people their space.

Share a kind word where possible. Overlook an insult.
Forgive.

I'm working overtime on not letting my defensiveness over
attacks and hurts lead my behavior. Hard work to say the least.
What I'm working on is that other people are caught up in their
own turmoil, and nothing they do or say is really personal....no
matter how personal it gets. (People lash out to release their
demons. People lash out at others out of fear. It's a call for
help more than a call to arms.)

I'm trying to let people be exactly who they are, and not get
nuts thinking I need to change them or that anything is 'wrong'
with them. A friend told me last night that everybody has some 
good in them, and our job is to find it, focus on it, and embrace
it.  I'm trying...so hard.

When I start to lash out at another because of how they have
behaved, I am trying to stop myself and recognize; No one who
feels well would act that way. Don't further someone's misery by
saying or doing something designed to add hurt. Don't lack the
strength to be compassionate when someone is obviously on the
edge. Don't insult someone, their thoughts, their means of support...
even if they have done the same to you.

That animal urge....that human condition of warring and rending
asunder...defending ourselves at all costs....it's powerful. But if
we don't stop the back-and-forth, where does it end? When does
the cycle stop? I'm trying hard to be a better man.

If I can't overlook and embrace, then let me respect space and
steer away from those personalities it seems impossible to make peace
with. I want to learn discipline and control, but if each attempt to
reconcile between ' being peaceful' and 'getting the upper hand' is
a painful stalemate....best to leave well enough alone.
Let me remember the aftermath of a biting remark can last a lifetime.
My petty, false sense of triumph is fleeting and hollow.

In the moment of passion, remembering that there's a hurting soul
on the other side of a conflict is easily lost. Maybe if I can just
remember the difference between my defiant, public self and my
vulnerable, private self, I could remember that others share the
same split. We share so much more than we realize.

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